I did. I survived. As I shared in an earlier post, this is a year of “lasts.” It is my last year as a homeschooling mom. It is my last year as a mom to kids who are not adults. It is my last year that I am guaranteed that my twins will sleep in the room next to mine.
Friday was the last volleyball game. It was senior night. It was a night that I stood between my twin daughters as I heard the announcer list off their future endeavors. I couldn’t hear the announcement very well from where we stood but that was a good thing. Who wants to ugly cry in front of a gym full of people?
My heart ached just a touch but that was due to the fact that my husband was working in North Carolina on hurricane recovery and had to miss the special evening. I was a proud Mom. My girls are a delight to my life and they truly are amazing young women.
It’s Confession Time
It’s confession time. Last winter I was in a dark place. the final year I faced was more than I could bare. I struggled with depression and tearful days. I was concerned that I would spend the year crying as I faced all the “lasts.”
But God. Yes, God had a plan for me. He always has a plan and even when we can’t see any hope for the future, He has our future in the palm of His hand. “But my whole life has been being a mom!” “But homeschooling has been my purpose.” But, but, but, list anything behind the but and the answer to that statement will be, but God. God has a plan. God has a purpose. He knows all that we feel. He knows all that we struggle with and He knows our future.
I have faced tragedy in my life that I thought would swallow me whole. But it didn’t. In the midst, I thought there was no hope. On this side of it, I have been given joy, delight and a fullness I never even imagined. In the midst of a storm it is easy to lose all hope but hope is our lifeline. Always grab hold of that lifeline and don’t let it go.
Because of God and the plan He had for me all along, I am enjoying these, “lasts.” Time keeps ticking and I keep getting older. I can’t stop the delightful days and make them linger just a touch longer. However, I can choose to enjoy the lasts in my life and I have discovered there are still many firsts to enjoy. Even as we age, God still has surprises in store for us.
I was afraid my life was over but God gave me a new aspect of my life that is just beginning.
I Have a Secret
I have a secret. I’ve been waiting until it is official but I’ll just let you in on what is in the works. After dreaming of becoming a published author my entire life, and putting my own dreams on the back burner while I enjoyed being a Mom, the realization of my dream is just around the corner. I have been offered not just one book contract from a publisher but a 3 book deal!!!!! I’m still in contract negotiations so that’s all I can say right now. I can’t wait until I can tell you ALL about it!!!!
God didn’t leave me hanging. He didn’t leave me feeling purposeless. He surprised me with something brand new.
You may be facing an empty nest. You may be facing the end of a career, the end of a relationship or the end of something that meant a great deal to you. Hang on to hope. You can face this, “last” knowing that God still has some “firsts” in store for you.
Something New and Exciting
Do you live in the Kokomo area and love to write? I am now the President of Word Weavers International, Kokomo. Word Weavers is a writing critique group dedicated to providing a forum for Christian writers to critique each other’s work in a face-to-face format in order to learn about and improve our craft. Word Weavers harnesses the power of community to help writers reach their goals. In addition to critiquing, members pray together, network and share writing news, publishing accomplishments and upcoming events. Benefits of membership include an annual conference, workshops, retreats and contests.
Word Weavers Kokomo begins January 15th and will meet each third Tuesday of the month at the South Branch of the Library. 1755 E. Center Road, Kokomo IN. Membership is $45 annually. Students are welcome to join, (14 years and up) for $35 a year.
Come join Word Weavers Kokomo! Please email me if you are interested. Debbiespence5@gmail.com
Check it out! WORD WEAVERS INTERNATIONAL
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